Spätzle.

I first prepared this item because I was bored one day.

Since you uncultured heathens surely have no idea: spätzle is a traditional German dumpling-noodle, often served with other foods designed to make one large and hairy. Though usually a side item, it can serve as a light meal because you're lazy.

Arrange in front of yourself these few ingredients:

½ cup flour (unbleached, unless you're some ponce with the mental image of flour as being white as pure Colombian)
1 egg (for God's sake, don't buy 'organic' eggs. They all come from the same damn chickens)
Splash of milk (I imagine that I can trust you to figure out how much a splash is)
Ground white pepper (yes, you git, white peppercorns)
¼ tsp dillweed (dill is not just a fucking pickle.)

After a gallon of water is set to boil, combine all ingredients in a suitable mixing bowl. Add flour until dough is not excessively sticky. Do this with your hands; that is what they are there for.

Pull the dough apart into bite-sized pieces and drop each into the boiling water. After approximately one to two minutes of immersion, each lump will bob to the surface; extract with a slotted spoon. You may need to gently agitate those on the bottom, as they often adhere.

Serve under melted butter (real butter - not margarine. And if I find out you're using a spray, I will insert the canister in your sinus cavity).

Recipes.